Building your self-esteem

How does low self-esteem manifest?

The word self esteem is often used to describe a person’s self-worth. The term self-esteem was coined by a Psychologist named William James. Various events and situations can play on your self-esteem, but what if you’ve consistently struggled with low self-esteem since childhood like myself? Certain sources such as disapproving authority figures (incl. overbearing/preoccupied/distant parents), being bullied, educational challenges, the media, trauma and belief systems can have an impact on your self-esteem. In addition, unhappy and toxic relationships can also affect your self-esteem.

Building your self-esteem can seem challenging and to be frank it can take time, so be patience with yourself. Our self-esteem can fluctuate on a daily basis and a myriad of situations can affect your self-esteem.

Check your belief system

We all have those questionable thoughts and beliefs like “nobody likes me” and some point you have to question where you picked up those beliefs. Was it your friends, family members, books or some random video? To every issue there is often a root cause. Breaking down these roots can be helpful to examining where these beliefs manifested from.

Discover your strengths and continue to develop them

Another great way to build your self-esteem is to work on your strengths and reflect on your achievements. For example, if you are a good cook, consider strengthening that skill.

Be compassionate with yourself

Try not to be hard on yourself, building your self-esteem can take time and that’s okay. Being compassionate with oneself according to Harvard Health can lower feelings of anxiety. “Self-compassion involves a consistent attitude of kindness and acceptance toward ourselves as a whole.” - Kristin Neff, leading researcher on self-compassion